Statewide Forum THE FIRST STATEWIDE FORUM on Domestic Violence was held on Wednesday, June 18 in the Cochrane Conference Center in John F. Andrews Medical Arts building. (Photo Lisa Kristeoff)

The Cochrane Conference Center at the new John F. Andrews Medical Arts Building was the setting for the first in a series of town meetings on domestic violence to be held around the state.

The June 18 town meeting was co-sponsored by the Boothbay Region Domestic Abuse Prevention Council (BRDAPC) and the Department of Public Safety (DPS).

Speakers included Department of Public Safety Commissioner Anne Jordan, Christopher Cote of DPS who facilitated the discussion, St. Andrews Hosptial & Healthcare Center President Peggy Pinkham and New Hope For Women community educator Tina Tucker.

Forty-plus individuals attended the forum, which received coverage from WCSH Channel 6 reporter Kristen Cullen and cameraman Charlie Berg.

Attendees were comprised of residents, law enforcement officials, the courts, state agencies and victim services: New Hope For Women and the Boothbay Region's Domestic Abuse Prevention Council that included:

Jordan, who selected Boothbay Harbor as the site of the first of the forums because she perceives the community as one that has gone "beyond with a sustained effort" to increase awareness and promote prevention, is also Chair of Maine's Commission on Domestic Violence.

Officers from State Police Troop D out of Thomaston, Sgt. Pat Higgins and officer Fred Hutchings of BHPD, Representative Bruce MacDonald, Sheriff Todd Brackett, Nurse Practitioner Anne Barker, Kathleen Morgan - executive director of New Hope For Women, District Attorney Geoff Rushlau, Assistant Public Safety Commissioner Janet Richards.

Boothbay Region Domestic Abuse Prevention Council members St. Andrews Hospital & Healthcare President Peggy Pinkham, Holly Stover of the Dept. of Health and Human Services, BRES school counselor Jeanne Tonon, Jane Good, the Reverend Sarah Foulger, Tina Tucker of New Hope For Women.

Pinkham related the history of the BRDAPC to the audience as part of the welcome. The birth of the council was a response to the double murder in August 2004 of Chellie Calloway and her mother-in-law, Sally Murray by Calloway's estranged husband, and Murray's son, Jon Dilley in front of the couple's two children.

The shock and disbelief of the community that "something like that" could ever happen here prompted Pinkham to begin contacting local organizations, the media, law enforcement, the schools and others to deal with a community that was forever changed.

In October of 2004, the first community forum on domestic violence was held in Boothbay Harbor. One hundred-plus individuals, including Attorney General Steven Rowe, were in attendance.

Pinkham invited interested citizens to continue the dialogue begun that night by forming a group, now known as the BRDAPC.

Rowe's sample workplace domestic violence policy was the model for what would become St. Andrews' policy. Pinkham then enlisted the help of New Hope For Women to train all of the staff at the hospital.

The town offices followed suit and in the last two years Boothbay, Southport and Boothbay Harbor have created domestic violence in the workplace policies.

In her opening remarks, Public Safety Commissioner Anne Jordan, appointed by Governor John Baldacci in 2007, gave an overview of how the concept for the town meetings evolved.

Early last summer in Wells, a mother of two young boys was murdered by her soon-to-be ex- husband. After killing his wife, he turned the gun on himself.

Family members approached Senator Nancy Sullivan of Biddeford because they "didn't know what resources were available, what more they could have done to prevent the horrible tragedy."

Sullivan drafted an extensive bill and brought it to Jordan.

"I said that given the budget situation in Augusta that we should go out and talk to the people in the community. Find out what they think is working, not working, what needs to be improved," said Jordan.

Jordan informed those in attendance that for the third consecutive year, the number of domestic violence assaults increased 3.7 percent.

"Typically half of Maine's homicides are domestic-related, so far this year, 13 of the 17 homicides involved domestic violence," said Jordan.

"Maine is a leader in many ways in the nation - we drafted the first law to include pets in protection orders," Jordan said. "Study after study showed that one of the barriers to leaving an abuser in a domestic situation is the victim(s) do not want to leave their pet(s) behind for fear they will be killed."

Jordan, and Christopher Cote, who conducted the discussion, are seeking input from community members - residents, leaders, victim's services workers - anyone who can offer new ideas, let her know what is working, what is not working and what is needed.

"There is a strong connection between pet abuse and domestic abuse," said Tucker. "Many times women are afraid to leave for fear of what will happen to their pet. Sometimes the abuser tortures the animal in front of them. It is terrorizing and control.

Tucker told the group that New Hope has safe places for pets - and for small animals, at a moment's notice.

She suggested that more education is needed regarding animals/pets.

"A child that tortures animals is a warning sign," Tucker said.

Brackett added that under Maine law, animal control officers must take the state's domestic violence training course.

The instance of elder abuse is also increasing. Stover said that Lincoln County is the oldest county in the state and that it has the highest number of median age elderly.

Combating familial and generational attitudes make it difficult for officers, and concerned neighbors and friends, to be of aid.

All too often the abuser is a member of the family. Families often feel that what happens in the family stays within the confines of the household - one does not confide in a neighbor, friend or professional such as an officer or physician.

Pinkham acknowledged that addressing elder abuse in a family situation is extremely difficult.

In many cases, an elderly relative is living with a son or daughter or grandchild who would never dream of reporting their loved one to the authorities and have to accept what is happening to them.

The family the elderly individual lives with often has control over the elder's money.

Good said that the message of power and control is very important for the public to be aware of.

Stover suggested that if there was a way to work with the banking industry to enable the institutions to be able to protect the accounts of the elderly it might prove to be a useful tool.

"Banks are often the first to observe changes, continual withdrawals and other patterns," Stover said.

BRDAPC member Good asked the police officers if they believed protection orders were effective.

Boothbay Harbor Sergeant Higgins said they were effective, but abused. Problems arise in situations where a woman takes out an order against her abuser and then invites him over to talk, one thing leads to another, the police are called in, and the abuser is arrested for violating the order.

"The protection order and bail conditions are designed to be black and white, and the most important reason for that is so there is accountability," Rushlau said. "It is a difficult situation that can be remedied in court. If one party abuses the order, the other party can have it altered or rescinded in court."

Couples who decide they want to work things out through counseling have to have the protection order rescinded or altered by the court before they can have contact.

In recent years, there are fewer

men and women seeking law enforcement careers. Troop D's officers are responsible for four counties and have been stretched thin.

Currently, there is only one domestic violence detective for the whole of Lincoln County.

Rushlau noted that over the last two years there has been an increased effort placed on educating the public about domestic violence and its warning signs. He asked if the officers' present felt calls were on the rise.

Higgins said they were increasing. He related that just the week before there were three domestic violence incidents - one with a female perpetrator - that resulted in two arrests.

In the schools, with the increase in teen dating violence and underage drinking, a huge barrier for law enforcement is that the two entities cannot share information.

Good said that our community was fortunate to have a police chief who saw having a presence in the schools important and Chief Hasch was often in the schools.

Sheriff Brackett interjected that he and the Chief had spoken on several occasions about officers in the school. He said that he and the chief agreed that enough time was not being spent in the schools.

"Other schools have officers there every day - not policing, but as a resource for the kids," Brackett said. "Chief Hasch does what he can, but he has a lot on his plate and cannot do it all."

Good said the council had discovered a gap in what they could accomplish when it came to helping women who had reached the point where they could leave.

"In the last few months it has been very frustrating, we have had two cases where women were living in hotel rooms with a couple of children and we did not have a temporary house or apartment to offer them," said Goode.

"Another woman had no car - we are now looking into Freedom Wheels. But, these women are desperate and scared. We [the council] have been talking about various fund-raisers to hold to ensure we have money for these situations."

Stover noted that thanks to the four towns (Boothbay, Boothbay Harbor, Southport and Edgecomb), the faith community and organizations such as the Boothbay Region Community Resources, the Rotary and others, for coming through with financial and material resources for victims.

Stover said that with increased awareness, victim resources must be ready when called upon.

"If you say you will be there to help if a woman (and her children and possibly pet(s)) are ready to leave, you have to be there for them to provide housing, food, clothing and whatever they need," said Stover.

Good added that when a woman does leave, with her children and, many times, the family pet(s) - she does so without belongings.

But what she does pack is fear: fear of getting caught, fear of retaliation, and fear of the future.

Jordan asked if there was a way that the council or a group such as Boothbay Community Resources could set up a revolving loan at one of the local banks for needed assistance with housing, clothing and fuel.

Another option for funding would be to apply for the STOP grant to assist in providing safe housing for women.

STOP: Services, Training, Officers, Prosecutors. This grant is administered through the Maine Department of Public Safety since 1995. Eligible applicants include non-governmental victim services programs and public and private non-profit organizations among others.

The STOP grant is awarded through a request for proposal (RFP) process authorized by the Division of Purchases with award decisions made by the Maine Justice Assistance Council.

Awards of this grant fund law enforcement training, including judges, prosecutors and other court personnel, expanding units of law enforcement office, developing and enlarging or strengthening victim services - and many others.

This program is administered by the Secretary of State and is a service to Maine residents that are victims of domestic violence, sexual assault or stalking.

The program not only designates an address to victims who have been moved to a new location unknown to the abuser, but it also provides them with a free first-class confidential mail forwarding service.

Schools must accept the ACP address when a child presents an authorization card. The student does not (and should not) disclose his or her actual address.

Application can be made in person, with the help of an application assistant at one of the office locations. www.maine.gov/sos/acp

Rushlau said people have to be willing to fund positions - whether it is a domestic violence detective, or a police officer for a school.

Networking between local entities working is crucial to educating the public and seeking ways to assist victims of domestic violence.

On our peninsula, the Boothbay Harbor Police Department, the Lincoln County Sheriff's Office, BRDAPC, New Hope For Women, Boothbay Region YMCA, Boothbay region schools - both administrators and members of the student body, Superintendent Eileen King, the Boothbay Register, faith community, civic organizations, hair salons - all work together to form a cohesive, grass-roots base.

Stover stressed the importance of local media in educating the public and increasing awareness of domestic violence and the issues of its victims.

"Our local paper comes out weekly and has been a huge resource for this community. For several years, they have run a four-part series on domestic violence in October … we get more press in our local paper on domestic violence than any other paper in the state," said Stover. "Our media keeps the message going all of the time."

Jordan said that sometimes the journalists must be educated as well: she was once asked if she could get some victims together for a photo to accompany an article.

Pinkham added, "We could not have done any of this if we hadn't partnered with New Hope. Communities need to take note of the various groups in the state, identify which one is closest to them, and be sure they have a resource for those who contact them for help. It would be an injustice to victims if there wasn't an agency to refer them to."

Upcoming town meetings on domestic violence: Skowhegan on July 9 and Presque Isle on August 7. Other meetings will be announced when scheduled.

"We really want to hear from the people of Maine and we know that everyone will not be able to attend these gatherings," said Jordan. "Call, send an e-mail, communicate with us. If there are people out there that wanted to attend, but could not, please e-mail me."

Jordan contact info: 626-3800 or

Anne.H.Jordan@maine.gov

New Hope's Tina Tucker had the last word at the forum.

"The seed of all of this activism was the homicides that took place here on August 21, 2004 and the forum that followed on October 5.

"This region's Domestic Abuse Prevention Council has done exemplary work like no other community has done. It has been a humbling experience for me to work with this community and see what they have done.

"We [New Hope] cannot do it alone, our work must be a coordinated effort with the public and until a community owns the problem it is not going to happen."

Tucker urged other communities to take the responsibility.

"I am glad to have had a `front row office' here in Boothbay Harbor and I would say that the Boothbay region should challenge the rest of the state to take the same action they have. It would be a tribute to these folks here to see it carried forward. Imagine it."